Forget networking, build real connections instead
I used to think networking meant standing in a crowded room, awkwardly holding a lukewarm drink while trying to wedge myself into a conversation with people who already seemed to know each other. It felt like forced small talk with an agenda, and as an introvert who can sometimes present as an extrovert, I dreaded it.
But here’s the thing: whether we like it or not, networking is one of the most important career skills. It’s how opportunities happen, doors open, and relationships form. Up to 85% of jobs are filled through networking, yet so many of us avoid it because it feels unnatural, transactional, or just plain awkward.
That’s exactly why we tackled this in the latest WorkWell Podcast episode, Taking the Work Out of Networking. This blog will give you solid, practical strategies, but if you want to hear real-world stories, deeper insights, and a little bit of tough love, the podcast episode is where it all comes together.
The good news? There are ways to make networking feel effortless and authentic - and yes, that includes having a simple, go-to pitch that doesn’t make you cringe.
Why networking feels hard
If the thought of networking makes you cringe, you’re not alone. Some of the most common reasons people avoid it include:
Fear of rejection or judgment - the idea that someone might brush you off
Not knowing what to say - the panic of making small talk with strangers
Feeling like a phoney - wondering if you have anything valuable to offer
A bad past experience - one awkward interaction can make you avoid it altogether
Introversion or social anxiety - the sheer exhaustion of peopling
These are all valid feelings, but here’s the reframe: networking isn’t about working a room. It’s about making meaningful connections over time. And chances are, you’re already doing it without realising - catching up with a former colleague, DMing someone about a cool project they worked on, or even swapping book recommendations. That’s all networking, too.
Networking, but make it human
So, how do you network without feeling like you need to "perform"? Here are a few mindset shifts that take the work out of networking:
Think connections, not contacts
Forget “networking” and focus on connecting. The best professional relationships start the same way friendships do - through shared interests, curiosity, and real conversation. Instead of collecting LinkedIn connections, aim to genuinely get to know people.
Play the long game
Networking isn’t just about immediate opportunities, it’s about planting seeds for the future. Some of the most valuable connections won’t seem relevant right away, but they can open doors in ways you never expected.
Create a simple, natural mini-pitch
Whether you’re introducing yourself at an event or reconnecting with an old contact, having a short, clear way to describe what you do (without it feeling robotic) makes networking so much easier. Think of it as an introduction, not a sales pitch, something that reflects who you are and what excites you about your work.
Take the ‘event’ out of networking
Some of the best networking happens in places you wouldn’t expect:
Social media - engaging with posts, sharing insights, or starting discussions
Everyday interactions - a coffee shop chat or a casual exchange at a friend’s dinner party
Inside your company - getting to know colleagues in different departments
Reaching out digitally - a simple “Loved your recent talk on X - would love to connect” can go a long way
Networking for introverts
If you’re an introvert, networking might seem like an extrovert’s game, but you actually have an advantage: depth. You’re naturally good at forming meaningful, one-on-one connections, which is exactly what great networking is built on. Instead of forcing yourself into high-energy settings, lean into what works for you:
Set a goal: instead of trying to “meet everyone,” aim for one or two meaningful conversations
Leverage written communication: introverts often shine in thoughtful follow-up emails or LinkedIn messages
Find structured networking spaces: webinars, Slack groups, or industry forums can feel more natural than large networking events
Prepare conversation starters: having a few go-to questions in your back pocket can ease anxiety
How to keep the connection alive
Making a connection is one thing, maintaining it is another. Here’s how to keep networking from becoming another task on your to-do list:
Follow up with a simple message: “Great chatting with you at X! Let’s keep in touch.”
Engage on social media: comment on posts, share resources, or tag people in relevant articles.
Check in now and then: networking isn’t just reaching out when you need something. A simple “Hey, saw this and thought of you” keeps the connection alive.
Be a connector: introducing two people who might benefit from knowing each other makes you more valuable in your network.
Networking and self-promotion go hand in hand
If networking feels awkward, chances are self-promotion does, too. And here’s the truth: you can’t build meaningful professional relationships if you’re constantly downplaying yourself.
If you hesitate to talk about your skills, struggle with imposter syndrome, or second-guess how you present yourself, Own Your Brilliance was designed for you. It’ll help you speak about yourself with confidence, own your wins, and navigate networking conversations without feeling fake or uncomfortable.
Use code OWNIT10 for 10% off, valid until February 28th. Click here to learn more.
Because working well starts with connecting well.
